Even Though My Family Is A Bunch of Sex Demons I'm Just A Horny Human! Ch 1


     Sleep is wonderful. The warmth of the blankets, the closeness of the sheets, the supreme bliss of my mind floating through nothingness, I love them them all. Yet those things can be taken away in an instant.

 

“Big bwuthuh!”

 

     Like a veteran responding to the first shots of a battle, my eyes snapped open as my little sister called her charge. That girl still had a lot to learn; she sounded like she was still at the top of the stairs and my room was at the end of the hall. She had given me time to prepare. In seconds my pillows made something resembling a human form beneath the comforter and I rolled under the bed. Seconds after that there was a gust of air on my face as the mattress above sagged under the impact of the tiny succubus landing on top of it.

 

The voice called out again. “Big bwu- huh? Where’d he go?”

 

     I allowed myself a silent chuckle as I thought about how close she was to her quarry without realizing it. One of these days she was going to realize where I managed to hide so quickly and I’d be screwed; it was kind of hard to move around down here and since my bed was against the wall I’d have nowhere to go. Until then I had a dim and actually pretty comfortable place to hide. I could even steal a few more minutes of sleep if I wanted. Making myself comfortable I turned my head away from what little light came under the bed skirt and found myself inches from a pair of glowing amber eyes.

 

“Hello~”

“Wah!”

 

     Shit! How had I even managed to get under the bed so fast when it took so long to get out? Every awkward wiggle took an eternity as I struggled to pull myself out. Just as I managed to get enough of my body out to turn over and try to make a run for it a hand latched onto my ankle and a familiar weight crashed into me from above. I went down hard.

 

    “There you are, big bwuthuh!” Oh Ema, my often adorable, sometimes annoying little sister. Of the two-pronged assault I faced every morning she was the least disagreeable; her attempts at getting into my pants were almost cute. More importantly right now, she was light; even I was man enough to carry an eight year old girl. If I could just stand up before Iri made it all of the way out from under the bed I could probably still make it down the stairs, get someplace our parents could see me and be safe. Mostly.

 

         Another burst of effort saw me into a kneeling position with a little girl on my back only to end up taking another mouthful of carpet as Iri took out my support leg. Before I could react a blue blur sandwiched my right arm between my body and its breasts and tangled its legs around mine. Following suit, Ema slid off my back and coiled around my other arm, giggling the entire time. I was caught.

 

“You’re a naughty boy, hiding from your sisters in the morning, you know,” Iri, my older sister, cooed into my right ear. God she was soft, having her wrapped around me was an uncomfortable feeling that caused an even more uncomfortable reaction in my pants.

 

“That was a pretty good hiding spot big bwudduh, but we found you now!” Ema, in stark contrast was flat as a board. I guess that was to be expected at her age even if she would start filling out soon.

 

“Can I get up now?” I asked.

“You’re going to get up, alright,” Irina giggled, followed by a quick lick of my ear.

“Yeah!” Ema agreed.

 

     As I squirmed under the combined weight of my sisters a fat cat’s head slid around the door frame. Schrodinger!

“You’re going to flatten out my nose,” I pleaded.

Iri didn’t seem to care. “You’d probably look better.” If you think I’m ugly then stop nibbling on my ear already!

“Big bwuthuh would be handsome no matter how funny his nose is!”

Time to give up on that approach. Schrodinger, go get help! Tell ma and Pa Timmy’s trapped in a well!

“Hey,” Iri sighed, “You must be tired of laying like that, why don’t you flip over? If you do maybe I can let you munch a different kind of carpet.”

“Ha! You’ve got nothin’ but hardwood floors and we both know it.”

“Wanna help me wax ‘em, then?”

“Only if I can spray you with disinfectant first!” It was really hard to make good comebacks with the flurries of kisses Ema was planting on my cheek. That girl really did have the cutest seduction techniques~

 

     Meanwhile the cat crept closer in that nonchalant way only cats do. That’s the wrong way, girl! Go get ma and pa! Schrodinger was no mind reader and my thoughts went unheard; to show that fact she stepped onto my head and sat her fat ass down as if I didn’t have enough weight on me already. Fucking cat.

 

“Kids, breakfast is ready!” Mom’s voice reached us before she stuck her head into the room. “Oh, you three look lively this morning.”

 

Actually, if this kept up I might die. More importantly though…

“Whose hand is that on my butt?”

My two sisters responded as one, in an unholy chorus of innocence and thinly veiled lust, “mine!”

 

     After freeing myself from my siblings and washing up I walked into the kitchen to feast upon the meal that rescued me. What would it be? Fillet Mignon? Suckling pig? Could it be an Imperial Feast? No, this smell was even better… pancakes!

 

     You could always tell how serious Dad was by how dirty his favorite “blow the cook” apron was, and today he was covered in a delicious rainbow from top to bottom. I bounced in my chair anxiously as he brought the plates over; there was blueberry for me, some kind of triple chocolate deal so full of chocolate they were almost black for Iri, a stack of cinnamon for Mom, and a couple of plain round ones for Dad. Ema took two plain pancakes as well, only hers were shaped like penises. I never understood that, but it was hard to care when Dad just made pancakes.

 

     Ema caught my eye as I reached for the syrup.

“Hey big bwutha, look at this.” Without breaking eye contact Ema took the whipped cream, sprayed a little on the tip of her prickcake. Her movements were smooth and far more sensuous than you’d expect from an eight year old as she slowly, seductively took the tip between her teeth and ripped it off.

“Th-that’s great, Ema,” I managed to choke out as my testicles made themselves at home next to my bladder.

“Are you ‘hard,’ big bwutha?”

“Ahaha, not just yet.” If I was any farther from hard I’d have to go pick out a gynecologist.

“Geeze Ema, that’s not how you do it,” Irina chided. “It’s like this.”

 

     I was a city boy. I wasn't sure I’d ever even seen a deer that wasn't electronic and in a Disneyland ride, let alone been around when one got hit by a car, but I knew full well what it meant to be a deer in the headlights. I had been given more than enough warning to know that it was time to leave the table and quietly nibble on a granola bar in my room, yet I couldn't. Instead I watched as Iri took one of her ridiculously dark pancakes, rolled it up and enthusiastically shoved it into the back of her throat. With her eyes never leaving mine Ema had gotten that much right, for sure she bobbed her head up and down, moaning a little each time as the tip of the pancake hit the back of her throat. She started slowly at first, then gradually increased her tempo before suddenly jerking her head back and spraying whipped cream into the open end of the pancake until her cheeks bulged out. Iri smiled at me, letting some of the cream seep out of the corner of her mouth in the process.

“So,” she asked after gulping down the last of the white foam, “are you hard yet, ‘big bwutha?’”

 

Rock hard, not that I’d let her know that.

 

“You really think playing with your food is sexy?”

“I think it can be,” Mom cut in before Irina could respond, “But you need a certain flair. It’s not all about soul gazing and moaning you know. Let’s see, if I were to do it would look like…”

 

     No. Please no. My mind can’t take this. It was long past time to leave again, but I was still a deer. Actually no, I wasn’t a deer; getting hit by a car wouldn’t be a violent enough example. I was watching a trainwreck, caught in a situation where I knew something absolutely horrifying was going to happen, but completely unable to look away.

 

     In contrast to Irina’s torrent of cream, the more experienced succubus sprayed out a line in the center of her pancake and tightly wrapped it until a bit of the cream protruded from the top and drizzled syrup over one side as a final touch. With the most loving bedroom eyes I’d ever seen— for all that means—  she teased her tongue up the thin stream of fluid, taking each rivulet of syrup into her mouth before going back down to the bottom to work her way up again. The syrup wasn’t very thick, so she always had to reclean a spot she had cleaned on the stroke before. Her progression to the tip was torturously slow.

 

     Once she finally made it to the top of the pancake, leaving a shiny trail of her saliva in her wake, she held her hair back with one hand, and moved to the tip. I expected her to lap up the whipped cream, but instead she kissed it. Over and over again she brought her mouth to the pancake, gave the cream a light kiss ending with a little smack and licked what little stuck to her lips away. Every so many strokes she’d do something different and flick her tongue out over the utmost tip of the remaining whipped cream, letting out a breathy moan as her tongue came back in. The looks she gave me when she did that... I could hear my heartbeat.

 

     With that finally gone, she looked at me longingly before gingerly sliding the pancake into the back of her mouth and sucking on the entire thing so hard her cheeks caved in, making the lewdest slurping noise humanly imaginable. And the finishing touch? The pancake just kept going deeper. She didn’t look away for even a moment as inch after inch of that pancake slid into the abyss. The entire thing went down without her chewing even once. Stunned silence filled the room for several seconds before Irina ended the quiet with the understatement of the year.

 

“That was hot.”

“I’ll say.” Dad agreed.

“See that look on your father’s face? That’s what you’re going for at the end.”

 

And what a look it was.

 

My old man tilted his head slightly as another thought came to him. “Still, it seems like kind of a waste to just swallow it like that. I put a lot of work into those, you know?”

“Fufu, don’t worry dear, I enjoyed every. Single. Inch.”

 

The two of them spewed a bunch of unintelligible baby talk before leaning in for a kiss on the lips and a giggle. Ick.

 

“Anyway, you've got wood now, right?” Mom asked as she moved away from Dad.

“Not answering that.” The little giggle I got in response said I’d already answered more than enough.

“No way, you’re such a pervert!” Iri sniggered behind her hand.

“I don’t wanna hear that from the slut who shows off her blowjob skills first thing in the morning.” It occurred to me right after I finished talking that I’d just insulted every woman at the table. Whoops.

“Dad!” Iri whined. She would go straight for the big guns.

“Don’t call your sister a slut,” he sighed, finally taking a fork to his pancakes.

“Why not?” I asked, “ It’s true, isn't it?”

“There are some things you don’t say even though they’re true.” Dad spoke the words in his best authority figure tone, but I couldn’t help but smirk at what he’d just admitted.

“Dear!”

“What?”

 

     I removed myself from the conversation as it flowed back to fellatio and seducing men with Mom teaching and Dad tossing in the odd anecdote. I was used to it, this was just another Saturday morning at my house. Still, it felt kind of awkward not being involved in the conversation at all; it only served to remind me of the differences between myself and everyone at the table. For one, I was human. That was normal for Mamono families; boys would be human whether their fathers still were or not and girls would be whatever race their mother was. Dad was human at one point, but after a few years of Mom’s demonic energy flowing into him he was a full incubus now; his muscular build, black horns, and sclera were proof of that.

 

     I took a bite of the best blueberry pancakes ever made and meditated on what would make someone want to hook up with succubus in the first place. Was it was something about the blue skin, heart shaped tail and ebony handlebar horns? Maybe they found the black sclera and yellow eyes the girls in my family had appealing. None of those things did anything for me though and it seemed like a good number of the people that hooked up with succubi had them use magic to hide some of those features too. Maybe that was it; succubi could use that magic to look however they wanted and perform near miracles in the sack, that’d be decent reason to chase after one, right?

 

     I allowed myself a quick glance at Irina, my eyes quickly darting over her full blue lips, past her prominent collar bones and landing solidly in the cleavage her thin white tank top barely held back. And it looked like she wasn’t wearing a bra today, either. Well, it wasn’t like those made any difference as far as the shape went and Mom was a sure indicator that she didn’t have to worry much about sagging. The table blocked the rest of her from sight, but I’d seen her taut stomach, narrow waist and long legs often enough to know they were there. Yeah, if Irina wasn’t a bitch I was unfortunate enough to be related to I’d probably be all over that. Since Irina was basically a shorter version of my mom with less pronounced hips and wider lips I could see what Dad saw, too.

 

     I stopped chewing for a second to wonder if there was anything wrong with the fact that I had not only  just checked out my sister to gauge how attractive my mom was, but had come to the conclusion that they were both pretty hot. I rolled the food around in my mouth contemplatively while I considered it. Meh. As for Ema… well, it was still too early to tell, but it was obvious she had the family legs.

 

“You’re awfully quiet today,” Mom stated with a worried tone in her voice. “Did something happen?”

“Huh?” I found myself a little off balance with the sudden snap back to reality. What had the conversation moved to again? Oh, right. “Um, I just don’t have an opinion on whether guys that are cut or uncut are more fun to play with, so I didn’t say anything.”

 

Actually, how was Ema in that conversation? I made a mental note to have her help me BS my next English paper.

 

“Okay, just remember that if you need to talk about anything your father and I are here, alright? Now then, it’s Irina’s turn to wash the dishes.”

“Do I have to?” Iri groaned.

“Yes. Because of that comment earlier your brother is going to help you though.”

“C’mon, I did the dishes last night!” I whined. I hated washing dishes!

“Both of you, move.” I hated being caught in Mom’s glare more though; off to do the dishes I went.

 

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